My Kids Are Dumb

E1 & E2 are playing DOG. That's right, DOG. E1 bosses E2 around while E2 happily crawls on the floor wearing a leash made from our cruise lanyards. UM.......Seriously? How dumb is E2? She willingly lets her sister say things like "NO NO. DOGS DON'T TALK. BE QUIET" or "GO FETCH" and then throws the balloon and/or kicks the balloon away from her. All the while, E2 smiles and "ruffs." WTF?!?
Is it wrong to say, "Hey E2, your sister is being a bitch and making you her bitch."

As I am contemplating educational testing for E2 (after all who willingly does something this stupid), E1 proves to be dumber than her sister. E1 decides it is a GREAT IDEA to TIE the lanyards to our plasma car and drive the car which will PULL THE DOG. (Remember, E2 is dog)

THANK G-D they did not get very far before an minor injury happened versus gee, I don't know - CHOKING!
HOLY HELL. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH MY OLDEST KID??? IDIOT.

After I explain the HAZARD in playing PLASMA CAR PULLS THE DOG, E1 acts like I ruined her life.

SORRY GIRLS, I WASN'T IN THE MOOD FOR AN EMERGENCY.
My kids are dumb. ALL KIDS ARE DUMB.

Maybe they can play let's drown each other in the bath tonight.