Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Because I am an A**Hole

Before I start my rant, I mean blog post, let me say I am not an "anti-vaxxer." As a cancer survivor, I completely understand what immuno-compromised means. As a mother who has seen the devastating effects from common illnesses, I understand the need for vaccines. As a person who is a fan of well health, I understand the purpose of vaccines. I understand what herd immunity means. My children are both completely vaccinated. What I will bitch about is the way people are vilified if they CHOOSE not to vaccinate. This is not a topic I would typically touch with a ten foot pole, but this momma is pissed off. I am sure by tomorrow, I will not be aggravated. Tonight, however, I am annoyed.

The school district sent home a sheet today explaining that my child along with all the other students could receive the flu vaccination from school. I MUST fill out the form. The form, itself, is not optional. The vaccination is.

After a few questions ranging from how old is your child to allergies to health issues, the district then gives you two choices. You MUST check one.

YES, I WANT TO HELP PROTECT MY FAMILY AND COMMUNITY FROM FLU BY ALLOWING MY CHILD TO RECEIVE A FLU VACCINE! (this option was written just like this- all caps, in bold, underlined)

NO, I DO NOT wish to help protect my child and community by allowing my child to participate(reason)_____
(written just like this- smaller font, no bold, no underline)

So to my daughter's school's district-
You have a lot of chutzpah to word your document this way. I would have checked yes, but due to your arrogance, I am checking no and here are my reasons:

  1. I am the parent.
  2. I will take my daughter to her doctor.
  3. I am an asshole.
  4. She already received her flu shot.
  5. Your job is to teach the state requirements and flu vaccination is not part of the curriculum.
  6. Fuck you.
  7. My kid hates needles.
  8. The flu vaccine is NOT required to attend school. When it is, you may have your opinion.
  9. My child's medical needs are my business.
  10. Your wording pissed me off.
  11. I am saying no because I want to see what happens.
  12. Because I said no and that is my right.
DAMN. Why is the form worded this way??? FOR REAL. How about:
____ I would like the school to administer the flu vaccination to my child.
____ I would not like the school to administer the flu vaccination to my child.

Is that so hard? If it is, I can help you redo the form for next year.

How dare you ASSume by checking no that I am careless, reckless, and do not give a damn about my child, my family, and my community. That could not be further from the truth! I care deeply about all those people. ALL of them. 

What I do not care for is your jackass attitude. Your jackass wording. Your jackass thought that a parent who checks no might actually be responsible and make a decision benefiting their child. 

Your form is maddening and again, I vaccinate my kids. I can only imagine what parents, who have valid reasons for saying no to the flu shot, are thinking. 

I get it. People die from the flu. I know this. I also know the flu vaccine is not legally required and your form is intended to scare people into checking yes.

I will protect my child, my family, and my community. I will also be checking NO. 
My reason? None of your damn business. 


  1. Oh my God!!! I was just railing about this exact same school form to my wife yesterday. If I wrote a post it would be almost word for word with what you wrote. Can you tell me what school district this is? I'm considering saying something to administration, but I don't want to get a bad reputation.

  2. I'm in Hays County and received the same letter. They did revise it before they sent it out with my other child. Still, not OK...

  3. According to a mutual friend, our kids attend the same elementary school. I returned mine today, but I edited my response to read "No, I do not wish to allow my child to participate because I said so." How dare they! And, no, you don't need my child's health insurance information. WTF.